9 months update (better late than never)

Now that we are only 9 days away from the girls being 10 months old I figure now would be the perfect time to do their 9 month update (what can I say life has been crazy).

Our wild little monkey, you make us laugh every single day and are the silliest little girl I know. You are allllll over the place and have been for the past few months. We have to watch you like a hawk or you will be climbing the walls if we are not careful. Speaking of climbing...you love it whether its into a dishwasher or on a person (especially me) you are a climber. You still have no teeth, but that is ok they will come. You are growing so fast and are almost 17 pounds putting you in the 26th percentile which is triple from 6 months...way to go girl!!! 

Our tiny little one, you are the sweetest girl in the world and know how to light up a room with your smile. You are finally mobile!!! Within the past week you have accomplished so many new things. You are now crawling, and sitting yourself up and you are now trying to pull yourself up! You are trying hard to catch up with your sister and are doing an excellent job...now to work on catching up to her weight! You have 2 teeth and I am sure there will be more any day. You are 14 pounds which is still in the 1st percentile, but we are working hard to improve that and get you healthy and strong!

You are both just a babbling away. I have been working hard with trying to get the girls to say Momma and Dada. Makenzie says Dada and Makayla says Momma all day long. It is quite ironic too because Makayla looks like Carl but is a mommas girl and Maknezie looks like me but is a daddy's girl. You both have your own language and clearly understand each other...it is so adorable! Waving is the new thing these days for both of you and you just ham it up all you can whenever you see someone!

You both love to be outside and swinging is your favorite!!! Makenzie you were not a huge fan of the slide (as seen with the scared face below), but I am sure one day you will love it!

We are so incredibly blessed by you girls and love watching you learn new things on a daily basis! It is crazy how fast time is flying by with you two and as much as I wish it would slow down every single moment is precious and appreciated!!!

*Pictures taken by the wonderful Tonya Mae Photography . If you would like to see the rest of the photos from their 9 month shoot please click on the following link: 9 month photos

She did great!!!

After a night of no sleep we checked in at the Duke Children's Hospital in Durham at 6:30 am for Makenzie's Endoscopy. We then sat in the waiting room for over an hour...why do they do this...we have a starving baby and frazzled nerves?! They finally called our names and we went back into pre-op where we went over a bazillion questions, met with the Dr doing the surgery, the anesthesiologist, and several nurses. For the most part it was just the basic stuff they have to go over with you, but I did have quite a few questions for the Dr. The main one being if they found something that needed to be surgically repaired today would she go ahead and fix it? Dr B said that she honestly did not feel that she was going to find anything structurally wrong & her main concern was getting the biopsies, but IF she did find something there was a list of things she would repair today and things she would not dependent upon what it was. After going over everything about the surgery and our questions it was time to take Makenzie back to the operating room.





The anesthesiologist asked if we wanted to carry her back and of course we said yes. Once we got in the OR things moved at warp speed. Makenzie had her bunny lovie she sleeps with and the anesthesiologist grabbed it and put a mask on it to show her thats what she was going to do to her. In true Makenzie form she grabbed the mask and started to put it over her mouth and chew on it. All of a sudden the nurse and anesthesiologist moved Makenzie and put the real gas mask over her mouth...to be honest I thought that she was just showing her what she was going to do, but within seconds I knew this was the real stuff. It was TOUGH to watch to say the least. It went really quick though and we kissed her and were escorted out (crying of course).



Then it was time to wait. Surprisingly it went quicker then we expected and we were escorted into the consultation room to talk with the Dr. I was NERVOUS...it almost seemed too quick! Dr B came in the room and we heard the words we had been waiting for "she did great"! Wooohooo!!! She proceeded to show us pictures and go over the report with us. Structurally things looked normal just as she suspected. They took biopsies of the esophagus, stomach, and duodenum and now we wait on these results for a week. We were relieved nothing further had to be done today and that things looked good, but had a million questions. Here are a few I can remember:

• What are you looking for with the biopsies? The main things are for Eosinaphil's and Celiac
• What if you find these? There are ways to manage this and we will
• What if the biopsies come back normal? Dr B has a plan of attack which part of is specific medications (that we have not tried and only specialists prescribe to babies) and if those don't do the trick...possible surgery (to stretch something out if I remember correctly) but that would be down the road after exhausting all other options.
• Are we overreacting could she just be a kid that throws up A LOT and is tiny? No absolutely not. She was thriving and all of a sudden she is not and we have to figure out why.

We talked to the Dr for a while and now that I sit down to type this is pretty much all that I can remember, but I'm impressed I remember anything at this point. It's been a long few weeks and I am exhausted! What I do know and remember is that things went great and we have a Dr who cares and is concerned and has a plan of action which was music to our ears. I literally cried tears of joy thanking Dr B. After our pediatrician told me about their waiting list and how quick they are to let patients go if there is nothing they can do I was so worried if they did not find anything today we would be released. Thankfully we are now at the right place and I truly believe we will figure out how to get our sweet girl back on track and growing! Dr B even told us about a former patient with somewhat similar circumstances...I won't go into all the details, but I will tell you that they figured out how to handle things and got the baby growing. I am confident she will do the same for our little one!



After meeting with the Dr we were taken back to the post-op area. Before we even got close to the doors I could hear our sweet girl screaming! She rarely cries, but when she does it is sad. She was pissed! We rushed to her bedside and Carl held her while I fixed a bottle. I then rocked & fed her and she sucked it down quickly! She then went back to crying immediately. Because her vitals were so good they cleared her pretty quickly for discharge...hallelujah! When the nurse tried to take out her IV she puked everywhere in very typical fashion...as her aunt said she has to leave her mark everywhere and boy is she good at that! I was worried they would keep her because the pre op nurse told me she had to keep down liquids before being released, but hello that is why we are there! They still let us go thankfully! The second they said we could go we bolted out of there to get our girl home and snuggle!!!

She has done pretty well for the most part this afternoon other than the normal side affects. Now we wait to hear on the biopsy results and dependent upon those we will go from there. I can't thank you all enough for your prayers and support! They were felt for sure! As hard as this was to put our girl through this we know we did the absolute right thing for our girl and felt so at peace about it especially after speaking with Dr B afterwards.

**Please excuse the very hot baby hairs/fly aways in the above picture! I was just thankful to be holding my baby girl!!!

Ready or not it's happening...

This morning a nurse from the anesthesiology department at Duke called to go over Makenzie's "Surgery" instructions for Friday. Until this call I had not heard it called anything other than an Endoscopy, but it does make sense after looking at the definition of surgery. It just caught me off guard and honestly freaked me out a little bit more thinking of it that way. Before going over everything today with the nurse I was trying to not think about the fact that she is going under anesthesia and was just focusing on getting answers and ruling out the big stuff. Now I am starting to get nervous...who can blame me though it's my baby!

The nurse reviewed all of the pre-op instructions which most of it we already knew from the instruction sheet they had provided when we set the appointment. Worst part for her is no food/milk after midnight! We check in at 6:30 and surgery is scheduled for 8 so she should be nice and HUNGRY. The nurse then told me all about the procedure and that they will be taking some biopsies of different areas. It should only take about 30 minutes give or take for the actual procedure (which may be the longest 30 minutes ever). After the procedure Makenzie will have to be in recovery and pass certain requirements before they release her which could take anywhere from 15 minutes to 2 hours afterwards just depending. We will see the Dr at some point and she will go over how things went with us, but the biopsies will take some time to get the results.

Then she asked if I had any questions...I told her I was under the impression we would be with her when they put her under anesthesia and when she came out so I asked her again to reassure myself. She proceeded to tell me it is totally dependent upon the anesthesiologist. Hopefully we get an understanding one and are able to be with her. I won't go into detail, but the nurse did scare warn me how it can be very hard to watch with a baby because of the different types of reactions they have. Really?! I have never heard this, but I guess it's not the most common thing people I know have dealt with. I was also not expecting that she said for a few hours afterwards her head/neck will be like a newborn again so we will have to be careful. I have a feeling there will be lots of extra snuggling our baby girl anyhow so this will not be a problem!

This phone call made it very real for me, but I know that God is in control and everything will be just fine!!! We are very blessed and it could be so much worse and this is just a small stepping stone for her that we will get through!

Endoscopy

I cannot believe that the 13th is almost here already. When we first went to Duke and tentatively scheduled Makenzie for an Endoscopy it seemed far away, but here it is sneaking up on us already.
After receiving normal results from the Cystic Fibrosis Test and Gastric Emptying Study we were extremely happy and thankful. We were also nervous though because that meant we would be moving forward with the Endoscopy which means having to put Makenzie under anesthesia. We questioned whether or not we should move forward...what if everything comes back normal and we put her through this for nothing?! Well honestly we want everything to come back normal as nice as answers would be we don't want them to find anything wrong with her.

Over the last couple of weeks I have had long and detailed conversations with Makenzie's pediatrician and staff at Duke to reassure us on what was best to do. The pediatrician, Dr T, told me that they do not take these things lightly at all and based on her history, symptoms, and weight this is absolutely necessary in order to rule things out. Not only that but there are only a few GI specialists in the state and there is a loooong waiting list to get in with one so she said if they don't see the need to continue even seeing a patient they have no problem releasing them quickly. Dr T said she would absolutely go forward with this and hopefully they will rule all the possibilities out. All of the staff at Duke (who are moms themselves) said based on everything (and they used a bunch of big words that I really did not understand) also confirmed we should  absolutely do it. So after discussing things with Carl and all the consults we are going to listen to their recommendations and do it!

We have been asked what they are looking for. Well the answer is a lot and to be honest its a lot of big words and after my experience with "Dr Google" in the past I have decided instead of obsessing over the possibilities we will just wait and see what happens Friday. There is no point in worrying about what could be when it could all be normal.

What if everything is normal from the Endoscopy then what?! That will be AWESOME, but we still have to figure out what is going on so we will regroup with the Drs at Duke and go from there.

Everyone I know keeps saying well maybe she is just tiny...duh we know she is going to be tiny. The problem is not that she is tiny! The main concern of all the medical professionals is she has fallen off the growth curve she was on. Each individual sets their own growth curve evidently. Its one thing to be small all along but to fall off suddenly and even lose weight is not normal. There are so many possibilities and reasons from head to toe that this happens, and we are in the process of ruling those causes/possiblities out. Not to even mention how sick she gets...yes I know all kids have some reflux and get sick (as long as they are gaining weight though it is not usually a concern at all), but trust me if you saw it happen you would realize Makenzie getting sick is not normal...especially when it comes from her nose (poor girl looks like the exorcist) plus the weight loss! The last couple weeks have been better and she has not been vomiting everything up at night which is wonderful, however she is not gaining weight and gets sick randomly throughout the day now which is concerning. Since Makenzie's 6 month appointment to her appointment yesterday sweet girl has gained only 1 pound in a little over 3 months (Dr T said she should be gaining at least a half ounce a day which she is no where near). So if they want to run tests in order to rule every single cause/possibility out it is our job as her parents to follow the professionals lead and listen to all of their major concerns and make sure nothing is wrong in order to get her healthy and growing!

Please continue to think and pray for our sweet little Makenzie and all of us throughout this. Thank you!

4 Incredible Years

Cannot believe four years ago today I married my best friend and love of my life and all that has happened since then! This is the blog posting I wrote last year and it just brings back a flood of memories... 

APRIL 5, 2011

3 Years!!! Woohoo!!!

Happy 3 Year Anniversary Honey!!! Can you believe its been 3 years?! It feels like yesterday I was getting ready with the girls right about this time and preparing to walk down the aisle to say I do! When those big doors opened and I saw you for the first time that special day it was the best moment ever...now fast forward 3 years later with some amazing ups and downs we are preparing for two little miracles on the way! Its been a long but incredible road and I am so excited for this next step in our journey...you are going to be the best daddy in the world and our girls are so lucky to have you and I am blessed to call you my hubby! Enjoy these precious memories!

I cannot wait to share these pictures with our girls!!! Our wedding day was such a special day and in honor of our anniversary I wanted to share some of that with you guys! Thank you everyone who was a part of making our big day so incredible!!! We love you all!

**Warning the links below are major picture overload and long (but the memories are too priceless to cut any out) so watch at your own risk ;)

Wedding Ceremony Pictures

Wedding Portraits

Wedding Reception Pictures

Wow was I right or what?! Carl you are the best Daddy in the world and I could not imagine doing this without you!!! We are beyond blessed by all that you do for us everyday and hope that you know how much we love and appreciate you! I could go on forever, but I will make this short and sweet and just say...Happy anniversary babe and I look forward to what the next hundred will bring us!!!!!!!!!!!! XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

April 2008

April 2012

Wow what a difference 4 years makes!!!

Last week Makezie went back to Duke for a Gastric Emptying Study and Cystic Fibrosis testing to hopefully rule some stuff out. After arriving and checking in we were taken back to the Jim Valvano Day Hospital where she would have a sweat chloride test  to determine whether or not she had Cystic Fibrosis. The process for the test was not painful just very uncomfortable for her. Basically they hooked her up to a machine with copper plates that helped her to sweat then they wrapped her with really thick saran wrap and ace bandages to collect the sweat for 30 minutes on each arm. Not only was it uncomfortable for her, but because she was later having the gastric emptying study she was not allowed to eat anything that morning so she was very hungry by this point. All in all though she handled it very well and I am thankful that they wanted to confirm whether or not CF was a possibility so we did not have to wonder. During the test I had the chance to talk with the nurse about how nice the facilities are and asked what all they do in the Day Hospital. The nurse told me it's pretty much for cancer and transplant patients for follow ups and chemo along with some other random stuff such as this and testing. When we were waiting for the sweat to collect I had the chance to look out of our room and see some kids hooked up to machines and going through all types of stuff...it was heartbreaking. This all just made me realize how extremely blessed we are with our girls. Yes we may be going through some difficulties with Makenzie right now, but overall we have two beautiful healthy babies. I prayed for all of those patients and thanked God over and over for our health and blessings.


Does this not look like something you would see for the electric chair?!


Showing off her sweat wrap


Poor girl was not happy at this point


After the sweat test was over we headed down to Nuclear Medicine Diagnostics for the Gastric Emptying Study. First they put a slight amount of radioactive tracer in a bottle for Makenzie that she had to drink within 10 minutes. Of course she puked part of it up and at first the tech was worried she did not keep enough down for the test. Thankfully she still had enough in her so we did not have to come back to do it on another day. Then they strapped her down to a table that had an X-ray machine underneath that would take images every 10 seconds for the next 61 minutes. This did not go well. She was pissed to say the least. She hated being strapped down plus it was passed nap time and she was hungry! It was miserable for us all. Poor baby cried for 47 of the 61 minutes. I tried everything I could do while she was strapped to this table, but all she wanted was to be held and just kept reaching for me...it is heart-wrenching to not be able to hold your baby when thats all she wants!!!  At one point I had to step away out of her view and then the tech stepped in and tried to calm her down. Nothing we did worked, but she finally just cried herself to sleep after 47 loooong minutes of screaming which she never ever does. Then the test was over and I had to wake her up after only a short nap. She really did not mind too much though because I could FINALLY hold her! Of course as soon as we headed out of the testing area she projectile vomited in the hallway all over. I then had to clean up the floors, stroller, myself, and change her. I was so ready to get out of there, go pick up Makayla, and get home to love on my girls which is what we did!


NOT HAPPY


Finally asleep


When we scheduled these tests we were told it was going to be days before we got any results, but the nurse told me to call that afternoon to check on things so I did. I actually got a call back that afternoon right before they closed and received her results. First I was told Makenzie DOES NOT have Cystic Fibrosis!!!! PtL! We did not think she did, but based on her history and symptoms it was important to rule this out first so we can move on to other things. I was thankful to not even have this as a possibility anymore and glad that it was ruled out!!! Then the nurse told me that basically the Gastric Emptying Study was normal. There was some confusion on these results (more on that later), but basically things looked normal. This is all excellent news, but also means we have to move on to the next round of things which means Makenzie will now have to have an Endoscopy and be put under Anesthesia. I will go into more detail on this shortly.

I cannot express how much everyones thoughts and prayers have meant to us. I have seriously been overwhelmed by so many of you. We have received the most heartfelt messages at the exact moment we needed them and it has made this process so much easier. It is not over by any means so we still need your thoughts and prayers and thank you so much in advance from us all!!!

Update on our Little Squeaker

1st off thank you all for all of your prayers & support!!! Your messages, comments, texts, and calls have meant the world to us and been such an encouragement throughout all of this! I wish I had the time to respond to everyone individually, but right now that is impossible with all that is going on. So thank you all!!!

2nd I am not even going to waste any time talking about the few days Makenzie was in the hospital as I had originally said I would do. Honestly the whole thing just frustrates me to know that things were not done that could/should have been. So as Carl keeps telling me there is nothing we can do now so I just need to get over it and move on plus everything happens for a reason. So moving on...

Monday we spent the morning at Duke meeting with Dr's and their nutritionist. The Dr's were great and really took their time with us going over Makenie's history and records. They truly were concerned with everything, getting answers, and figuring things out.  Basically they have come up with a plan of tests to run to try and get to the bottom of things. So tomorrow morning we go back for the first round of tests. The first thing is going to be a sweat test  to (hopefully) rule out Cystic Fibrosis . I truly do not think that she has CF especially since she passed the CF screening when she was born. Long story short though based on her history and symptoms they just want to be safe and test for it because evidently there are many different forms of CF and the screening does not test for them all. Then she will have a Gastric Emptying Study done afterwards to test some of the GI issues she has. Then we will wait for the results of these tests for a few days (LONG few days of waiting I am sure). Once we figure these results out we will find out the next step or just move on to the next round of testing. The next round would include having to put our sweet little girl under anesthesia  which I really hope we don't have to go through with, but if we do we will face that then.

Tomorrow the girls turn 9 months old which is unbelievable to me!!! Poor Makenzie gets to celebrate by going through a bunch of tests, but hopefully we can figure things out and get her growing again and healthy! Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers for the tests tomorrow (especially having to starve her for them) and hopefully a simple diagnosis/treatment. Thank you!

**I realized I never even got around to sharing their 8 month photos so here are our beautiful girls (I'm actually impressed I am posting them in the correct month considering how crazy life has been...gotta give myself some type of credit even if it is on the last day my babies are 8 months old)**

Here is a recap of why we ended up in the hospital with our little squeaker for those that have been asking and wondering ...

For as long as I can remember Makenzie has been a major vomiter. When I say vomit I don't mean spit up...full on large amounts of serious vomit and half the time it is projectile. Around 2 months was when it got pretty bad and by this time she was already trying her second reflux medicine. They even at one point thought she may have a dairy allergy so I was told to cut dairy completely out of my diet to breastfeed and even tried her on some hypoallergenic formulas as well to see if it helped at all. After 4 weeks of that and no difference with her puking the Dr's told me I could start eating dairy again which I was happy about but not that she was still getting so sick. I even met with a lactation consultant several times throughout all of this to see if that had anything to do with it, but still nothing helped. Because she was still gaining weight although it drastically slowed down (were talking from the 8th to 1st percentile in a short period of time) they continued to just blame it on reflux and said she will soon grow out of it. We even changed her to a 3rd reflux medicine after more issues and by 6 months and still no difference the Dr's told me to actually stop giving the meds to her. Since she was eating more solids at this time they thought her getting sick would settle down and not be so bad...boy were they wrong!!! She began having these spells of projectile puking every night for like 3 days in a row and then she would have good days where she kept everything down with just a little spit up here and there. Oh did I mention she was also constipated throughout all of this and when she would go it was like hard rabbit pellets?! Well she was and we tried many things for this as well. Throughout all of this thankfully she has remained the happiest and sweetest little baby no matter what.

So how did this lead to the hospital? Well Back on Wednesday March 7 Makenzie began with another one of her spells of serious projectile vomiting. Long story short she was sick throughout the afternoons and evening and after many calls with the Dr and not keeping anything down after trying all we were told to do we ended up at the pediatrician on Saturday morning. I think they thought she might have a stomach bug because they prescribed her some Zofran. I assured them she was not sick and this has been happening for months off and on so the Dr looked back through her records and finally started to take things seriously. She also realized she had barely gained weight in the past 6 weeks and then got concerned. We had had issues with her weight in the past but never this bad. She said if this does not pass and things get worse we will schedule a head and abdominal ultrasound this week and sent us home with the Zofran. Well things did not get better in fact it took a turn for the worse and she started getting so sick it was coming out of her nose. It was awful!!! Sadly I even started taking pictures and video of the after effects so I could show the Dr's that were not taking me seriously as proof that it was not spit up!!! So Monday morning they called and scheduled her for a head and abdominal ultrasound Wednesday morning.

Wednesday morning came and I had to starve the poor baby for the ultrasound so it was not an easy exam to say the least!!! They finally let me feed her part way through and the rest of it went much better. The radiologist came in to let me know her head looked great and there was some minor stuff on her abdominal u/s, but she would send the report to the Dr asap. (The reason they were checking her brain was because when I was pregnant there were signs of possible hydrocephalus on the ultrasounds (they checked when she was born though and it was fine) and often projectile vomiting can be a sign as well so they wanted to double check.)

We went on with the rest of our day as normal waiting to hear from our Dr yet they never called. Wednesday night was an awful night for our poor little girl. She got the sickest she ever has and it scared & frustrated us. Needless to say there was no sleeping for this momma that night because I could not wait for the Dr to open and get her in there asap which is what I did. We went to the Dr first thing and when they weighed her she had actually lost weight :( I was not surprised after how sick she had been, but I was not expecting it to be such a huge deal. The Dr came in with her intern and I showed them the pictures and videos I had taken and they were in shock. The Dr looks at me and told me "we need to admit Makenzie to the hospital for "failure to thrive"...she went on to say she has lost weight, she has not stopped getting sick plus her history. Then she began to go over the ultrasound results and there was some minor concerns over her kidneys and something with her liver so she felt it best if she was admitted. Honestly after she said "we need to admit Makenzie to the hospital..." I pretty much zoned out due to shock so the rest of the time there was a bit of a blur.

While we were waiting for a room to be available at the hospital I went and got things in order for Makayla and took care of some stuff. We finally got the call that a room was ready for her and off to the hospital we went.

**I will have to write a separate post about hospital, but in the meantime please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we will be taking Makenzie to Duke Children's Hospital & Health Center to see the specialists Monday morning.**


A HUGE thank you to all those praying and supporting us all throughout this...you have no idea how much we appreciate and need it!!!

PS I may be biased but could she be any cuter?!?! I just love this sweet little girl!

This sweet little girl needs some prayers again. Long story short after months and months of issues with weight gain, very large amount projectile vomitting (seriously like exorcist style & it is SCARY & SAD), and several other concerns things took a turn for the worse starting last Wednesday so tomorrow she will have an ultrasound on her brain and abdomen. Hopefully everything will be normal on these scans and then we will go on to the next step which will be to see a GI specialist. I am staying optimistic that everything will check out normal, but because of some of the concerns on our prenatal ultrasounds and symptoms and issues she has been having they want to check these things out first to be safe. I am thankful that they are finally taking this seriously, but just hate that it took a turn for the worse for the Dr's to finally get it and take this next step. There is nothing worse in this world than seeing your child in pain or suffer in any way, but praise the Lord for the most part she is still the sweetest and happiest little girl! We just want answers and to get her healthy and as strong as can be and appreciate any thoughts and prayers!!!

Diaper Cakes

My awesome giraffe diaper cakes from our baby shower in Raleigh last May made by my "chosen Sister" Angela and her family.


Makenzie and Makayla wearing the shirts (and probably the last of the diapers) from the diaper cakes 9 months later.




Who knew how stinkin cute the girls were going to be in these shirts one day and how useful every bit of these cakes would be?!

Thank you Cottles and Leisters for making these awesome diaper cakes!!! We have already used all the diapers too and that was so helpful!!!